Thank You Nina. You write briliantly.

Darwina. Hartamas residential park. ‘Tits’. Mineral water. Baju kurung. School buses. 1500 hrs meeting. That left turn to MITI.

“Feelings are chemical”

“It’s beyond our (two people) control”

Tulis. Tulis. Tulis.

Sometimes we both agree that the answer to life is 42.

Darwina is scared of dying. But bold enough to tell me why.

We have another one lost soul, lingers around Solaris or some shitty bar somewhere, drinking till the last drop.

We have passed ‘The Weekenders: The Vampire, The Rich Kid, The Depressed Girl, and The Stoner’ chapter.

It has been a year.

Darwina and I, and the week days.

6191.

I’m one of the horses.

Old story about a plant that turned everyone crazy, now isn’t gonna make us laugh.

Theories; right and wrong ones. We hold so dear, believing them only if we’re together. Times in another, we are frightened by them.

Mom, dad, mama, papa, sisters.

New painted walls in Darwina’s apartment.

Her petting zoo.

My CDs are now all over the place.

We don’t care about songs now.

Radiohead’s Surprise; Darwina’s funeral song.

Mine is Jimmy Eat World’s May Angels Lead You In.

Thank you. I love the necklace.

Darwina’s long hours wait.

“Sampai bila?”

“Kejar bahagia”

Happiness in topics. I reserved my comments in most of the time.

Darwina’s theories on marriage.

My funny speculation on Judaism and Christianity.

A captain and Saving Private Darwina.

Are we losing faith in one another?

I’m writing a book in my mind.

This chapter still feels like an introductory. If it ends, what will happen to the rest of the book?

To find a person that inspires...and hilarious and unintentionally destructing you...

...is got to be a search of a lifetime. I’m not sure I wanna go through a quest, again. Leave it to Hans Solo.

Best of friends? Worst of friends? Two worst of friends turned best friends.

In the month of April? Or could be May? June perhaps?

Playground.

An empty house after an open field.

1 to 2 to 3 to 4 to 3 to 2

Monsters and ghosts. Voices and noises. Dreams and sleeping with a smile carved on Darwina’s lips.

I drove, and drove, and drove. She refused to most of the time.

Darwina drove to the shop for bread, one day. To feed me.

Change of moods. Change of promises. Change of judgment. Change of perception. Change of friends, who have resented us. We have not changed.

My favourite chapter, so far. Though it’s unfinished.

Most exclusive and personal and true.

Darwina should come up with a title for it.


Tear up the pages if you wanna.

I’d still have my copy

Was made to be your best friend :)

Dear Darwina D Dazman,

I finally found it. My medium of expression at its best; A song. And i dedicated it to you. I know it may sound too much or seems like i'm going out of line, but all i meant is to tell you that i love you and thanks for being you and letting me see that. Been a wonderful year and hell of a journey...but i would not have it any differently.

The Story by Brandi carlile

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am

But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you

I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby I broke them all for you

Because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do
I was made for you

You see the smile that's on my mouth
It's hiding the words that don't come out
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head is a mess

No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what
I've been through like you do
And I was made for you...

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am

But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you

bff always,
N